Fake Tales of San Francisco
Echo through the room
It might point to a wedding disco
Without a bride or groom

There's a supercool band yeah
With the trilby's and the glasses of white wine
And all the weekend rock stars are in the toilets
Practicing their lines

I don't want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don't want to hear, you know
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don't want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don't want to hear you
I don't want to hear your...

Fake Tales of San Fransisco
Echo through the air
And there's a few bored faces in the back hall
Wishing they weren't there

And as the microphone squeeks
The young girl's telephone beeps
Yeah she's dashing for the exit
And she's running for the streets outside
"Are you saving me," she screams down the line
"The band weren't very good
And I'm not having a nice time"

I don't want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don't want to hear, you know
(Kick me out, kick me out)

And though this bird thinks it's amazing
And so all that's left
Is the proof that love's not only blind but deaf

Thoughts of San Francisco is from Hunter's Bar (?)
I don't quite know the distance
But I'm sure that's far
Yeah I'm sure that's pretty far

And yeah, I'd love to tell you all my problems
You're not from New York City, you're from Rotherham
So get off the bandwagon, and put down the handbook
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook
Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook
Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook
Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook
Yeah