just the other day you called me from your bed
you said there was something stuck all up inside your head
well i'm the best of all doctors for miles around
all the townsfolk count on me here in my hometown
i said baby don't you worry cause you're in the right hands
when it comes to brain surgery i'm the man-in-demand

l.o.b.o.t.o.m.y. oh my!

'scuse me patient it's time for your lobotomy
can't guarantee you won't lose your memories
it's a delicate operation so hold still please
gotta keep my concentration during surgery

well i'm not exactly certified for this procedure
guide to brain surgery, i'm glad to meet ya
this copy's missing pages six through a hundred and twelve
but it was only fifty cents at the library book sale, oh well

when this is all over you'll be rid of all bad memories
i'll dig them out of your head along with your hopes and dreams
along with all that unnatural thinking that you don't really need
you'll be completely freed from your incriminating disease