Words and music by Tom T. Hall
From Real - The Tom T. Hall Project
Originally by Tom T. Hall

Have you read any good telephone books lately?
If you ain't then let me recommend one
I've already read that tulsa telephone book thirteen times
If you don't know any last names it ain't much fun
Readin' that tulsa telephone book, can drive a guy insane
Especially if that girl you're lookin' for has no last name
I gotta find her and tell her, I don't want our love to end
So I'm readin' that tulsa telephone book again
Well, I was in tulsa and didn't have anything goin'
She lived in tulsa and didn't have anything on
She said, "my name is juanita," and I said, "my name is j.b. [t.]"
When I woke up the very next mornin' she was gone
All of the tulsa operators know my voice now
And they gotta know how long I've been alone
If you meet a girl named juanita with some ribbons in her hair
Would you tell her that she's wanted on the phone
Readin' that tulsa telephone book, can drive a guy insane
Especially if that girl you're lookin' for has no last name
I gotta find her and tell her, I don't want our love to end
So I'm readin' that tulsa telephone book again