there was this kid named syd and he was born
maybe the doctor hit him a little too hard
he just seemed to have gotten off to a bad start
never relax never relax never relax

big brothers and big sisters gave him lots of attention
but syd was a hyperactive kid
he just never seemed able to sit still
never relax never relax never relax

never relax
never relax never relax never relax

unlike the other kids on his block
syd never learned how to walk
he just ran around acting nervous
never relax never relax never relax

he sat in school in detention
drawing funny pictures on the wall
not a moment of peace did syd ever find
never relax never relax never relax

never relax
never relax never relax never relax

now when syd discovered mastrubation
he just couldn't keep a good thing down
but it didnt help much his condidton
never relax never relax never relax

syd signed up for the army
cause he got tired of working in the pottery
and they sent him to a foriegn country
never relax never relax never relax

syd met this girl in east germany
and she invited him up to his room for some tea
then she pulled out a gun and took his money
never relax never relax never relax

she shot syd through the head
and syd died and went to hell
and he burned and he burned and he yelled
never been relaxed never relax never relax

now the devil said this aint fair
most people who come here have had their share of comfort
so he sat syd in a reclining chair
but it was an electric chair
never relax never relax never relax

never relax
never relax never relax never relax