I hate old folks yes I do
I wish they'd go away,
they think the world should owe them something
because their hair is gray.

They fart and wheeze and read a lot
and they watch things on T.V.
They walk with canes and crippled brains
they can barely even see.

I hate old folks yes I do
their lives have all turned stale,
if I was king of America
I'd throw them all in jail.

They always call you Sonny,
and they pinch you on the cheek.
They're always making dumb remarks
like "You've grown like a weed!"

They think they're just so fucking smart
'cause they've lived for 80 years.
They're always whining about their hearts
and they shout 'cause they can't hear.

I hate old folks yes I do
their lives have all turned stale,
if I was king of America
I'd throw them all in jail.