When I was a young boy
knee-high to a pig
I had so much life in me
I'd run and skip and hop and jig
I ate almost anything and everything I could
Buns and cakes and cakes and buns
My word those days they did taste good

Now I'm two foot taller
And the world's a different place
Seems the last thing anybody
wants to do is stuff their face
Mention what's for pudding
you'll only get a frown
Things that used to pick me up
it only seems will only bring me down

Talked to by the paper
it's becoming quite a bore
Throw it in the dustbin
'cos I've heard it all before

Chorus

Do you take sugar in tea?
Do you get enough Vitamin C?
Do you count your calories?
Are you virtually fat free?

Do you take sugar in tea?
Do you get enough Vitamin C?
Do you count your calories?
Are you virtually fat free?

Cut out your cholesterol
and keep your fibre high
Watch out for preservatives
read the pack before you buy
Keep an eye on sugar
stop caining all those sweets
Well I begin to wonder
if there's anything nice left to eat

Talked to by the TV
it's gone way beyond a joke
dietary pointers from a slimfast bloke

Do you take sugar in tea?
Do you get enough Vitamin C?
Do you count your calories?
Are you virtually fat free?

Do you take sugar in tea?
Do you get enough Vitamin C?
Do you count your calories?
Are you virtually fat free?

Do you take sugar in tea?
Do you get enough Vitamin C?
Do you count your calories?
Are you virtually fat free?
I don't want to cause a brouhaha
but don't you think it's gone a little too far
when you're giving me the third degree
just because I have a little bit of sugar in tea?

Do you take sugar in tea?
Do you get enough Vitamin C?
Do you count your calories?
Are you virtually fat free?
I don't want to cause a brouhaha
but don't you think it's gone a little too far
when you're giving me the third degree
just because I have a little bit of sugar in tea?

Do you take sugar in tea?
Do you get enough Vitamin C?
Do you count your calories?
Are you virtually fat free?
I don't want to cause a brouhaha
but don't you think it's gone a little too far
when you're giving me the third degree
just because I have a sugar in my tea?