Tell us once again this morning, old friend
how did you win the war?
Everybody loves a hero,
it won't matter if we've heard your
tale before
Tell us of the time when almost
everybody knew you were a star
And how intelligent you are
Prove that you're alive
Mr. Shuck 'n Jive

Tell us of the man who stole your for-
tune and nearly ruined your life.
Or better still-the one about the t.v. and
the couch and your best friends' wife

Tell us of grand projects never finished
with somebody else to blame
And all the reasons that your fame
never did arrive
Mr. Shuck 'n Jive

If you can get yourself together
kindly write a criticism of this song
How it's exquisitely constructed, yet
mechanical, and somehow slightly
wrong

Put it in your book about the enemy
you never even met
You know, you just might make it yet-
But I don't think you'll survive
Mr. Shuck 'n Jive

You know, you just might make it yet-
Mr. Shuck 'n Jive