When you're eating your breakfast cereal
Make sure that it's not ethereal
Or else you couldn't eat it
You couldn't even see it

When you're eating your breakfast food
And on the box there is some dude
With a captain's hat
I'm sure you know that

Chorus:
You should call him the captain
'Cause "cap'n" sounds real dumb
I lobby for captain
'Cause sayin' "cap'n" is no fun

If you try to tell some guy how to say it
Then he'll try to say the opposite
But you shouldn't quit

'Cause if you say the opposite of what he should say
Then it will be alright
It's gonna be alright!

Chorus