I come from the land where the oceans freeze
Spent three long months on the open seas
Paddled 'til it seemed I could take no more
When my ship hit ground on Prussia's shores

How was I to know that day
That the winds had swept me Wilson's way
'Cause soon towards me from the East
Came Wilson and his men on multi-beasts

Well it seems he didn't like my face
And I quickly learned that Prussia was an evil place
They tied me to a chair with a giant clip
And held a piece of paper to my tender nip(ple)

Then they tossed the chair in a tiny shack
And told me not to worry 'cause they'd soon be back
But I loosened up the binds where my hands were lashed
And ran towards the cove where my boat was stashed

Singing "Oh Wilson, someday I'll kill you 'til you die
Oh Wilson, Punch you in the Eye"

When Wilson knew that I was loose
I'd surely be subjected to some real abuse
Maybe end up hanging from the nearest tree
So angrily I paddled to the open sea

But the sea was eager to beat me back
And the waves grew huge and deadly black
And the gray clouds rumbled over my head
And I feared in my heart that I'd soon be dead

When the morning came and the storm had passed
And the dismal fog began at last
To open up before my eyes
And there I saw to my surprise

Chains and specks of islands curved
Where palm trees dipped and seagulls swerved
And I parked my kayak on a stone
And yelled across the ocean to his evil throne

I said "Oh Wilson, someday I'll kill you 'til you die
Oh Wilson, Punch you in the Eye
Wilson, kill you 'til you die
Oh Wilson, Punch you in the Eye"