Pound my knuckles hard against the floor. My head against the wall. But I did this to myself. Assume it's just not worth getting back up, but I'll blame it on bad luck. I'll shake responsibility (and say a hard life did this to me). I spent some time in a bad place at 18, wishing I could see something through clear eyes. Do you ever wake up to realize your life is meaningless? Does it give you strength or lead you to your grave at a young age? It seems that when I ran away from my past all my dignity, my faith, my pride got left back. And now I think it's time that I realize self pity's meaningless. Though I'm 10 feet deep, I'll claw my way back out from in my grave. But now I realize I'd give anything I have to walk a day in those old shoes. Wondering what my first smoke would be like, my first fuck, my next fuck up. Or the next band that would change my life and it changed my life.