like some sort of civilization, i look for peace in the night.
never have i felt so alone, so in a breath of hope do i take.
searching like a homeless nomad for a friend who will take me in...
if the touch were more like a friend, then the kiss would be a lover.
but i have not felt that touch. have not felt the warmth of those lips,
and the days pass by as years in the wake of my longing.

for it is in the absence of these elements in my life which make me cry out in the night.
and i yearn again to be whole. and i learn again to be whole.

i am so very scared and unashamed, longing for the peace that i once knew.
in the arms of a woman’s loving soul... solitude in the inclusion of dependence.
yet, a strength with defeats all pain and a quiet depth which completes me.
i am so very empty this night. my soul is drained and my mind is hungry.
i believe in a God who forgives me and i believe in a lover who makes me whole.
i believe in an everlasting friendship and in this cold world, i find these to be sacred.

for it is in the absence of these elements in my life which make me cry out in the night.
and i yearn again to be whole. and i learn again to be whole.