It's been awhile, and looking back
I keep losing track of how long it's been
and who left who again, and since when
the little hand is on the one
and I have just begun to suck on a lime
and start learning to tell time
I started feeling low a beer ago
and in about a gin and tonic or two
I'll be a blue hawaiin away from crying for you

Two martinis from now it won't matter much anyhow
I started to overflow two martinis ago

I couldn't last one gimlet more
but I've still got time for a sob and a sigh
and one more whisky and rye just went by
the little hand is on the two
I wonder what I'll do if it gets to three
how many teardrops will that be?

I bow my head and pray to be ok
and in a half a manhattan or so
I'll have two our fathers and one bloody mary to go

Two martinis hence it might start to make some sense
I unsealed my fate one fifth of bourbon too late

the little hand is on the three
how many teardrops will it be
till I collapse and your memory's under wraps?

there's so much getting through to catch up to
I'm still four white russians behind
I feel a Jim Beam shining on me
I might be losing my mind

In a teardrop or two it'll be time to get over you
and I'll figure out just how two martinis from now