Oh, I find much simple pleasure when I've had a tiring day,
In the bath,
In the bath

Where the noise of gently sponging seems to blend with my top A,
In the bath,
In the bath

To the skirl of pipes vibrating in the boiler room below,
I sing a pot pourri of all the songs I used to know,
And the water thunders in and gurgles down the overflow,
In the bath,
In the bath

Then the loathing for my fellows rises steaming from my brain,
In the bath,
In the bath

And condenses to the milk of human kindness once again,
In the bath,
In the bath

Oh, the tingling of the scrubbing brush, the flannel's soft caress,
To wield a lordly loofah is a joy I can't express,
How truely it is spoken one is next to godliness,
In the bath,
In the bath

Then there comes that dreadful moment when the water's running cold,
In the bath,
In the bath

When the soap is lost forever and you're feeling tired and old,
In the bath,
In the bath

It's time to pull the plug out,
Time to mop the bathroom floor.
The towel is in the cupboard,
And the cupboard is next door.
It's started running hot, let's have another hour or more,
In the bath,
In the bath

I can see the one salvation of the poor old human race,
In the bath,
In the bath

Let the nations of the world all meet together, face to face,
In the bath,
In the bath

With Verwoerd, and Kenyatta, and all those other chaps,
Nkrumah, Nabbaro, we'll get some peace perhaps,
Provided Swann and Flanders get the end without the taps,
In the bath,
In the bath