Oh the crack was ninety in the Isle of Man
Well weren't we the rare oul stock
Spent the evenin' gettin' locked
In the Ace O' Hearts where the high stools were engaging
Over the Butte Bridge, down by the dock,
The boat she sailed at five o'clock.
'Ah hurry on', said Whack,
'Or before we're there we'll all be back
Carry him if you can'
Oh the crack was ninety in the Isle of Man.

Before we reached the Alexander Base
The ding dong we did surely raise
In the bar of the ship, had great sport
As the boat she sailed out of the port
Landed up in the Douglas Head
Enquiring for a vacant bed
The dining room we soon got shown
By a decent looking woman
Saying 'Lads ate up if you can.'
Oh the crack was ninety in the Isle of Man.

Next morning we went for a ramble round
Viewed the sights of Douglas Town
Ended up in a mighty session
In a pub they call Dick Darby's.
We all got drunk by half past three
To sober up we went swimmin' in the sea
Back to the digs for the spruce up
While waitin' for the Rosie, we all drew up our plan.
Oh the crack was ninety in the Isle of Man.

That night we went to the Texas Bar,
Came back down by horse and car
Met Big Jim and all went in
To drink some wine in Yates'
The Liverpool girls it was said
Were all to be found in the Douglas Head.
McShane was there in tie and shirt.
The foreign queer was tryin' to flirt.
Sayin', 'Hey, girls, I'm your man.'
Oh the crack was ninety in the Isle of Man.

Whacker fancied his good looks
On the Isle of Man woman he was struck
The Liverpool lad was by her side and,
And he threw the jars into her.
Whacker thought he'd take a chance
He asked the quare one out to dance
Around the floor they rocked and rolled
To Whack it was no bother
Everythin' was goin' to plan.
Oh The crack was ninety in the Isle of Man.

The Isle of Man woman fancied Whack
Your man stood there till his mates came back
Whack! They all whacked into Whack
Whack was landed on his back.
The police force arrived as well,
Banjoed a couple of them as well
Landed up in the Douglas gaol
'Til the Dublin boat did sail,
Deported every man.
Oh the crack was ninety in the Isle of Man.