(Ian Hunter)

(Transcribed by Adrian Perkins; minor correction by Colin Ford)

How ya doin' - all right?

I-I-I spy with my little eye
Something beginning with you
Drool drool drool nearly fell off me stool
I hope you fancy me too
Now I don't wanna set the world on fire
Any old iron, any old iron will do (all right)

Smirk smirk smirk the G 'n T's work
She can knock 'em back like a fish
Smarm smarm smarm I turned up me charm
I think I'm on a promise (he thinks he's on a promise)
Some say yes 'n some say no
And my old man says 'Mind how you go'
A little bit o' this, a little bit o' that
If you can't take a joke well sod ya
(Oh) I'm a dysfunctional chap
'n they call me the Artful Dodger

Chat chat chat it's back to the flat
I strum me little Spanish guitar
Gloat gloat gloat she said 'n I'll quote
'You can take down my particulars' (take down her particulars)
It's a funny old life if you weaken, innit?
You gonna have a laugh, yeah you've gotta give it
A little bit o' this, a little bit o' that
Look out for PC Plodger
If a job's worth doin' it's worth doin' well
'n they call me the Artful Dodger

(Get on yer bike!)
I said yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah
If you can't take a joke well sod ya
(Oh) I'm a bit of a lad
'n they call me the Artful Dodger
(Now) a little bit o' this, a little bit o' that
Hoist up the Jolly Roger
That's the way to do it!
Call me the Artful Dodger
'n I'm doin' all right
Yes I'm doin' all right, yes I'm doin' all right
Yes I'm doing very well, thank you
How ya doin' all right (We're doin' all right)
How ya doin' all right (We're doin' all right)
How ya doin' all right (Yeah we're doin' all right)
How ya doin' all right (We're doin' all right)
They call me the Artful Dodger
They call me the Artful Dodger
They call me the Artful Dodger
... (repeat and fade)