In early '95, well, we got the dough so we could diversify
Had a lot of money up in bioweapons which has low liquidity
Sold a lot of Krugerrands and rubles to a bunch of really weird Swiss guys
And we were rockin'

Took a little while but we finally got to get our groove on
We were running weapons to a Cuban in Miami that just kind of flaked on us
Then there was the time I called John Gotti up and I asked him if his fridge was running
Well, he can laugh about it now
We can laugh about it now!

oh oh oh oh yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah, yeah, yeah...

Finally broke it open with the telecom and real estate in Asia
With a little luck we got fur markets in South America
Took a little longer with tin and amethyst in Zimbabwe
(a real old boys' network)

Got nine satellites in orbit, that helped coordination
Opened up affiliates in Nagasaki, Venice and Antananarivo
Joe got caught aboard a boat with seven tons of opium
In the Singapore harbor
Color us embarrassed!

oh oh oh oh yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah, yeah, yeah...

Well, finally the year 2000 comes and the Plan is looking aces
Got that crib in the Alps and Jason did buy that helicopter
Gave a quarter mil to the soundman Phil so he could run for Senate
He lost in the primary
But we still love him!

Got a little tip about a ginger ale company from Canada
Getting run into the ground by a trust fund kid that thought he could write songs
Had a couple parties on his yacht and Eric kinda borrowed his girlfriend
It's gonna be a very good year
A very, very good year...

oh oh oh oh yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah, yeah -- the Dismemberment Plan gets rich!