I've had an absolute cunt of a day
Everything that could go, did go wrong
so if im aloud to use the word cunt in a song
ive had an absolute cunt of a day

Started as a fart in bed well it started as a fart but i shit myself instead
And the fucking misses going off her fucking head
I've had an absolute cunt of a day
and running to the dunny like a bastard trying to hold it in with me finger up me arse
and skidding past the kids and them little cunts laughing
ive had an absolut cunt of a day

I've had an absolute cunt of a day
Everything that could go, did go wrong
so if im aloud to use the word cunt in a song
ive had an absolute cunt of a day

No hot water had to take a cold shower
scrubbing shit from every orifice took a fucking hour
then fuck fuck fuck no fucking towels
ive had an absolute cunt of a day

pulling on me jeans and tripped
broke me fucking nose and split me fucking lip
got me cock caught in me fucking zip
ive had an absolute cunt of a day

I've had an absolute cunt of a day
Everything that could go, did go wrong
so if im aloud to use the word cunt in a song
ive had an absolute cunt of a day

then driving meself to the doctors
busted and bleeding cock swollen and trobbing
not a good time to get stopped by the cops
ive had an absolute cunt of a day
bastards didnt even let me explain just cuffed me up and pulled me off to jail no fucking phone call, no fucking bail!
ive had an absolute cunt of a day

I've had an absolute cunt of a day
Everything that could go, did go wrong
so if im aloud to use the word cunt in a song
ive had an absolute cunt of a day

so your honour thats how it is thats exactly how it started and how it ended all up here, and you fucking lot laugh and aint making it too easy
ive had an absolute cunt of a day
and im in too much fucking pain to plead
and i dont give a fuck if you dont believe me
just take me out the back and fucking shoot me please!
ive had an absolute cunt of a day
ive had an absolute cunt of a day
everything that could go did go wrong, so if im aloud to use the word cunt in a song ive had an absolute cunt of a day
ive had an absolute cunt of a, just another one of them, ive had an absolute cunt of a day!!!