I love a feller and he loves me
But his mind has got a very strange twist.
I hesitate to introduce him to my friends.
In fact I'm thinking of introducing him to a psychoanalyst.

He keeps telling me he doesn't like my hat.
The brim's a little grim.
The crown's a little flat.
But just let anybody else mention that
And he'll yell and he'll hollar and he'll double up his fists, break your arm, black your eye, knock you down!
And for seven miles around you can hear the man insist, it's the prettiest hat in town.

Oh he keeps telling me my dancing's out of whack.
My waltz is full of faults,
My rumba's off the track.
But just let anybody else make a crack
And he'll yell and he'll hollar and he'll double up his fists, break your arm, black your eye, knock you down!
And for seven miles around you can hear the man insist it's the fanciest dancing in town.

That's loyalty.
A little peculiar,
But it's loyalty.
He figures it this way.
He can treat me like dirt,
But you better treat me like royalty.
Or he'll yell and he'll hollar and he'll double up his fists, break your arm, black your eye, knock you down.
And it really is immense how he comes to my defense if you even so much as frown.

I keep telling him I'm doing the best I can,
But he's got me on the pan
Saying my girdle shows, and powder your nose, and straighten your hose, and heaven only knows!
He'll yell and he'll hollar and a doll, a drool, a daisy, a dream, a ding dong delicacy, a moment so cream, according to him,
I'm just the loveliest gal in town!

-Miss Hutton will be back in just a moment.-

That's the story right there!
The loveliest gal in town!