You can't say 'cunt' in Canada
Saying 'cunt's' not very nice at all
No, you can't say 'cunt' in Canada
So we asked the sheilas what they called it
And they said muff, moot, minge, quinn, twat, little flower, twinkle, tunnel of love,
So if you say 'cunt' in Canada,
You gotta say it with a velvet glove.
And, you can't say 'cunt' in Canada

Now, you can't say 'cunt' in Canada
So I thought I better ask the guys
Now, you can't say 'cunt' in Canada
Why wasn't I surprised
When they said gash, pussy, poontang, beef curtain, burger, gateway to her guts
(Gateway to her guts? What was I smokin' when I wrote that one?)
Split whisker, beaver, long-eye, front bum, growler, hairy lassoo
No, you can't say 'cunt' in Canada
'Cause 'cunt's' considered pretty fuckin' rude

No, you can't say 'cunt' in Canada
So when I get to Montreal
If you're gonna say 'cunt' in Canada
You gotta say it in French as well
So here goes: pilerplut, la cunt, president, miteron, *kiss kiss* pepe le pew
No, you can't say 'cunt' in Canada
'Cause 'cunt's' considered pretty damn rude
And you can't say 'cunt' in Canada