Give me lots of money
A house upon a hill
Send me pretty women
Or threaten me and still

I'll come up to your house
And attempt to fix your sink
Do a mediocre job
As I'm leaving you will think
If you're needing something
You know that I'll be gone
I will not answer when you call
If you're waiting for me
Then you'll be waiting long
I can't be counted on at all
My eye is on the pork
The pork is in the pan
If something needs a'doing
Well you know I'm not your man
If you're counting on me
You know I'll let you down
You can't be counting on me
Cause you know I'm just a clown