"Marvin, I Love You"
Long ago, in another galaxy, there lived a gloomy robot. His name was
Marvin. He was getting old and a bit rusty, and nobody liked him. One
day, being very bored, he thought it would be a good idea to tidy up all

his old programs in his dusty old databank. There were tapes in there
that he hadn't played for years. Checking them through, he accidentally
pressed a wrong button and suddenly he heard:
"Marvin I love you
Marvin I love you"
Well, he was sure he hadn't heard that ever before, and he wasn't even
sure he'd heard it _that_ time; because being a bored and gloomy robot,
he hadn't really been listening. What was worse, he couldn't remember
what button he'd accidentally pressed. Anyway, he tried a few switches
at random and suddenly:
"Marvin I love you
Marvin I love you
Remember I'm programmed for you
I know we're worlds apart
Still you could break my heart
Loving you is all I can do"
Well he heard it that time alright, no doubt about it! Who was singing
these strange words? Was it another robot, or some strange lifeform from the
distant past, when he was a young robot and people still made the
occassional attempt to like him? He couldn't make it out at all. So he
pushed a few buttons again:
"Marv
in I love you
Marvin I love you"
That was it.
"I've tried to contact (you) Marvin
I don't know why, but you never replied.
Perhaps one day you'll answer,
But until then I guess I'll keep on trying."
Chorus
"That does not compute," he thought miserably. But at least he knew
where to find it in his databank. From then on, he could play it
whenever he wanted, think about what he'd missed, and live... miserably
ever after.
Chorus