He's a friend to all the stars
Made a fortune selling cars
Not beyond a little sleaze
He's Mr. White Keys

Wifey loves the tanning booth
Just a little altered truth
Made America's "Who's Who"
If he can do it so can you

Sheltered in taxs brakets
Higher than an angel's cloud
Pontificates on rackets
And cheats on his wife with his pals

Once he met a musical
Shook his hand like a soul man
Not a lot like you or me
He's Mr. White Keys

He climbs into daddy's Benz and goes collecting the rents of those welfare cheats

A lot of trouble when he tries to find the beat
He dances like a shovel with a couple left feet
He said he'd rather own the whole damn town
Than be graceful or be well-endowed

He exaggerates a bit
Foot and mouth a perfect fit
He's the one who tried the cheese
He's Mister White Keys

[Instrumental]

I feel sorry for the guy
I laugh when I see his shtick
All that poor bastard wanted
Was to make it with the beautiful chicks
But that don't excuse the prick
He's Mr. White Keys (3 times)

He's Mr. White Keys (3 times)

He's Mr. White Keys (3 times)

He climbs into daddy's Benz and goes collecting the rents of those Welfare cheats