He's saving up for a new Ben Sherman
He says he'd like to fuck Uma Thurman
I don't think that he'll get too far
With either those dreams
He's got his eyes on a pair of Pumas

He says I should cut my hair like Uma's
If he thinks I'd go along with
His sordid fancies

When you call my name
It better be me that you want
And not anyone else
If it's all the same
I don't want to get into bed
With your dreams there as well
Get through your head, or do I have to yell

That I don't want that
And well I might desert you
'Cos if I get a short back
And sides will that hurt you?

He says he's starting to feel quite horny
I say shut up and read your Nick Hornby
Then he pouts to try to sway me
But I don't think so
He says you can't waste a good erection
I think I'm starting to lose affection
I once felt for him, it's over
I tried to tell him

When you call my name
It better be me that you want
And not anyone else
If it's all the same
I don't want to get into bed
With your dreams there as well
Get through your head, or do I have to yell

That I don't want that (no way)
And well I might desert you (today)
'Cos if I get a short back (okay)
And sides will that hurt you?

(the cool breakdown with the handclaps)

When you call my name
It better be me that you want
And not anyone else
If it's all the same
I don't want to get into bed
With your dreams there as well
Get through your head, or at least through your gel

That I don't want that (no way)
And well I might desert you (today)
'Cos if I get a short back (okay)
And sides will that hurt you?