I talked to God and god said "Hey!
I've got a lot of things to say
write it down this very day
and spread the word in every way."

I talked to God and here¹s the deal:
He said to floss between each meal
Drive with both hands on the wheel
and on the first date don¹t cop a feel
Chorus
I talked to God and God said...nothing special
I talked to God and God said...nothing special
I talked to God and God said nothing
that we shouldn't already know
shouldn¹t already know
And talked to God and here's what he said:
"wear a helmet on your head
when you ride a bike instead
or you'll crash and end up dead."
I asked God for the Holy Word
ageless wisdom never heard
He just said to feed the birds
love your pets, clean up their turds
Chorus
I talked to God and God said "John,
I let them kill my only son
and my creation's so undone
that I can't help out everyone
But if you¹re looking for advice
you don't need to ask me twice
start with the basics: just be nice
and see if that makes things all right."