is finding a Christmas tree
The second thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
rigging up the lights,
and finding a Christmas tree
The third thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me

hangovers,
rigging up the lights,
and finding a Christmas tree
The fourth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
sending Christmas cards,
hangovers,
rigging up the lights,
and finding a Christmas tree
The fifth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
five months of bills,
sending Christmas cards,
hangovers,
rigging up the lights,
and finding a Christmas tree
The sixth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
facing my in-laws,
five months of bills,
I hate those Christmas cards,
hangovers,
rigging up these lights,
and finding a Christmas tree
The seventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
the Salvation Army,
facing my in-laws,
five months of bills,
sending Christmas cards,
oh geez,
I'm trying to rig up these lights,
and finding a Christmas tree
The eighth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
I want a Transformer for Christmas,
charities,
and what do you mean "your in-laws"?
five months of bills,
ugh! making out these cards,
Edith get me a beer huh?
what, we have no extension cords?
and finding a Christmas tree
The ninth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
finding parking spaces,
Daddy I want some candy!
donations,
facing my in-laws,
five months of bills,
writing out those Christmas cards,
hangovers,
now why the hell are they blinking?
and finding a Christmas tree
The tenth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
batteries not included,
no parking spaces,
buy me something!
get a job you bum!
facing the in-laws,
five months of bills,
yo ho, sending Christmas cards,
oh geez look at this,
one light goes out, they all go out!
and finding a Christmas tree
The eleventh thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
stale TV specials
batteries not included,
no parking spaces,
Mom I gotta go to the bathroom!
charities,
she's a witch, I hate her!
five months of bills,
oh, I don't even know half these people!
who's got the toilet paper?
get a flashlight I blew a fuse,
and finding a Christmas tree
The twelfth thing at Christmas that's such a pain to me
singing Christmas carols,
stale TV specials,
batteries not included,
no parking,
waaaaaaaaaaah!
charities,
gotta make 'em dinner,
five months of bills,
I'm not sending them this year, that's it!
shut up, you!
fine! You're so smart, you rig up the lights!
and finding a Christmas tree